Getting your groom involved

Hi ladies!

Do not mistake your man’s lack of enthusiasm for a lack of caring. Unlike us girls, rarely have they dreamt of their dream wedding since they were little boys. While we were busy playing dress-up in brides clothing, they were eating bugs and skipping rocks. Just because he doesn’t have a preference of gold overlays does not mean he doesn’t care. True story!

Dan has been super involved in the process and a total dream groom but the other day we were doing a table mock-up and he just didn’t seem to have an opinion on anything I was putting together. At the end of it all, I realized that a pink napkin was a pink napkin to him; blush is a reaction to embarrassment and pale is a sign of being under the weather, neither are colors in his eyes.

So, how can planning your wedding be an experience that you can both enjoy together? Check out my how-to guide for getting your man involved in the process. It’s working for me!

1. Let him know from the beginning that you want him to be involved and would appreciate his input and any ideas he has.
2. If he has an idea that you’re not crazy about, entertain it – it’s his wedding too. If you still don’t like it after exploring it further, work on an alternative together.
3. Give yourself enough time. There are going to be nights when after a long day’s work, your brain cannot function and reviewing your budget is simply not an option. If he (or you) is not feeling it, put it aside and tackle it tomorrow. By not leaving things to the last minute you will be able to enjoy these moments without feeling pressed for time.
4. Be mindful of his likes and dislikes. If he hates shopping, you would be doing both of you a favour if you saved the shopping tasks for your girl friends. If he has a major sweet tooth, ask for his dessert suggestions for the sweet table. If he loves surfing the net, ask him to do some research for different vendors, venues and pricing while he’s on there.
5. Take his strengths (and weaknesses) into consideration. Is he extremely organized? If so, suggest that he manages all RSVP’s, received gifts and thank-you cards. Perhaps he is a visual type. If so, creating a floor plan may be an easy and enjoyable task for him. If he’s a big spender, maybe you should keep track of the budget.
6. Create a strategy: thumbs up or thumbs down. His go-to answer when asked to choose anything will likely be ‘I’m happy with what makes you happy’. {Aw, that’s sweet… but it doesn’t help me make a decision!}He doesn’t have to be over the top in love with your lavender linens, but he should tell you if he doesn’t like it and you should respect his preferences. A simple yes or no will go a long way.
7. A little give and take. If your man is willing to sit through hours of flower options, maybe you can conveniently make plans the night of the big game and let him bro-out.
8. Make use of your bridesmaids. Your wedding is all about you and your man but it’s also a great bonding experience with your ladies. There’s only so much sparkle & glitter our poor men can handle. When you have 200 bows to tie, favors to assemble or envelopes to address, pick up a bottle of bubbly (or 2) and make a girls night out of it.
9. Keep it simple. Instead of endlessly browsing Pinterest together (amazingly fun for you, dreadful for him), compile a list of your top 5 cakes, table settings, color schemes, favor ideas, etc. and see which ones he likes best.
10. Have fun! No one likes a Bridezilla, especially the groom. I know months of planning, blood, sweat and tears go into the wedding but keep in mind that it is still a party. The more fun it is, the more he’ll want to be involved. Don’t sweat the small things, remember to laugh and enjoy every moment (even those that stress you out) because these will soon be memories – make them count!

I’d love to hear what tips have worked for you and the roles your guys’ have played in the wedding!

Hugs & Kisses

Lady Samantha

xoxo

Photo credit: http://www.magnetstreet.com/wedding-blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/groom1.jpg